memoir

“Should I Give Up?”: What Publishers Look for in A Memoir and What You Need to Know About Publishing a Memoir

May 18, 2015 by Lisa Tener

I received an e-mail from an aspiring author who found my website recently. She had shopped around her memoir and it did not generate interest from publishers. Now she says she’s about to give up. In her words, she doesn’t want to publish an ebook.

My sense was she did not necessarily have a solid understanding of what publishers look for in a memoir. She may have assumed that if her book was well written and would help people that would be enough. It’ s not. Publishing is a business and publishers need to make money.

They want to be sure there is a market for the book. That the book is worthwhile, certainly. And, yes, the quality of the writing is very important. Also, publishers and agents want to know that they are not taking a risk by taking on your book. Many authors mistakenly think that a publisher will promote your book if you just write a good book. If you read my blog regularly, you already know that it’s almost always the author’s job to promote the book and reach potential readers.

Here’s a great blog post, an interview with Literary Agent Regina Brooks that explains what publishers look for in a memoir.

Regarding the author who asked whether she should give up: I did wonder why this author saw her choice as: Get a book deal with a traditional publisher or give up. How about self-publishing? Self-publishing has become a much more viable option for authors and it gives you an opportunity to prove yourself to traditional publishers–either for the next book or even this first book–IF you are able to sell it successfully to a big enough audience–15,000 book buyers is often the magic number you’ll hear.

Plus, self publishing is often a successful endeavor in its own right:

– You can have your book more quickly–making a difference in your work and your life and helping readers sooner.

– You maintain control over title, cover, editing, decisions–you name it.

– You can change it and reprint if you decide you made a mistake or want to update it.

– You actually make more money per book.

This interview with Martha Rhodes, author of 3,000 Pulses Later, explores many of the advantages Martha reaped in self-publishing her book.

And just a couple of months after Kimber Simpkins self-published her memoir, Full, New Harbinger offered her a book deal, demonstrating that self-publishing can lead to a traditional book deal down the road–or even almost right away! Click Here to Tweet.

Regarding the writer’s concern about ebooks, there’s no reason to choose between ebooks and print books. The two can support each other. With print on demand (POD) printing options, you do not have to spend oodles of money in printing either. While you may spend some money on design and a few other fixed costs, POD printing technology offers the opportunity to only print–and pay for– books as they are purchased.

Now, if you do want to traditionally publish and do need to work on your author platform, you may also want to read about Author Platform on a Shoestring and Blogging to Grow Your Author Platform. And here’s how Dr. Victoria Dunckley took a small step that dramatically expanded her author platform.

Any questions? Feel free to comment below.

Do You Include Backstory in Your Memoir?

April 19, 2013 by Lisa Tener

Book writing coach Lisa Tener — Your Book Coach

In a book consultation a few days ago, I suggested that a client could make her story more compelling by cutting the backstory (her first chapter was actually called “backstory”–cute in theory but ho-hum-ish in reality).

Rather than make the backstory the appetizer of her book, I suggested the author envision it as a spice to sprinkle judiciously.

In general–and there can be exceptions–when you start with the agonizing details of your drawn out illness on page 1, you lose us. We want to hear about the day it all started to change when you joined a group of strangers and struggled up the mountaintop pre-dawn, all judgmental and insecure.

Sure, as you’re headed up the mountain, give us a little backstory, but we don’t need the loooooooong version.

In fact, the term “backstory” is often used in fiction and film where the backstory helps the writer connect with a character in order to write in that character’s voice and understand the character’s actions. Backstory can also help readers understand a character or narrator– and her circumstances–more deeply. But think actively about what readers need and will keep them engaged.

Be selective. Even if you do want to start with your predicament (such as the illness I mentioned earlier), one paragraph of spot-on description can be more powerful than a whole chapter of same. And, remember, in a memoir, as in a novel, you need to grab readers with something engaging or suspenseful from your first sentence.

Ask your memoir questions here…

Writing, Editing and Style: How Important is Tight Writing and Structure?

July 26, 2011 by Lisa Tener

I recently finished reading a moving memoir I happened upon through a newsletter subscriber. It’s written by an artist and I felt as if I were visiting with an old friend, vicariously enjoying her friendships and journey of personal growth.

The writing wasn’t crisp or particularly well organized, but I enjoyed the book just the same for the way the author’s openness, attitude and artist’s perspective shined through every word and the extreme experiences she survived and even thrived in.

writing for healing — If you're writing for your own personal healing, editing may not be a crucial step. Photo credit David Donohue: http://www.fotosbydavid.com/

It got me to thinking about writing quality and what standards we might have for ourselves as authors. Does a book need to be tight, perfect and well structured?

That depends on your goals. If you write to heal your own life or you write to inspire others with your story, maybe not.

If you are building a business or a brand as a speaker, entrepreneur or consultant, it better be as tight and polished as it can be–so you give an impression of excellence all around. Quality of writing and even the craft will reflect on your brand.

book writing vision — Reflect on your big picture vision for your book. If you're building your brand, building your expert credentials or writing for a large audience, editing becomes crucial. Photo credit David Donohue: http://www.fotosbydavid.com/

And, if you want to reach the greatest number of people as possible–certainly if you want to write a bestseller–make that additional investment of time and editing resources.

So many of our writing decisions depend on our goals. Whenever you are making decisions about your book, go back to your big vision and specific goals and the decision will become clearer.

What are your goals? Share here…or ask any editing questions as well. I’m happy to answer.

Literary Agent Regina Brooks on How to Publish a Memoir: 3 Must Haves

February 22, 2011 by Lisa Tener

Can you get a publisher for a memoir? Yes. Yes. Yes. Memoirs sell. There’s nothing quite like a bestselling memoir and publishers are still looking for them. Competition is fierce, though.

When my friend and colleague Literary Agent Regina Brooks told me she just signed a contract with St. Martin’s Press for her new book, How to Write, Sell and Market Your Memoir, I asked if she’d share a few insights pre-publication.

She generously agreed. So here are the 3 things Regina said every memoir needs:

1. A Strong Hook: What’s the book about? Can you couple two disparate subjects together in a surprising way? Does your book offer a fresh perspective on an evergreen subject? What will make readers grab it off the shelves and say, “I have to read that”?

2. Incredible Writing: Read your book aloud several times to hear nuances. Every sentence, ask yourself, “Am I making it real for my reader? Am I being specific enough?” Get readers in your target market to give you feedback. Definitely hire an experienced editor to help you polish your book. Even veteran writers hire editors–it’s hard to edit your own work.

Regina-Brooks-lowres-225x338 — Regina Brooks

3. Author Platform: Ugh, I know. Authors often feel despondent when they hear this one. “How will I ever create a platform?” Plank by plank–you can and will. Many of my clients start out stomach clenched and end up falling in love with this part of the business–after all, the more you reach people with your message, the more impact you’re making with it.

Regina says, “I’d like to dispel the myth that good writing requires a solitary life. On the contrary, I believe, the memoirist should engage with the public and drum up interest in the book’s subject. Far from serving as a distraction to the work, it can heighten an author’s enthusiasm and creativity.

“Building a platform is about learning to conceptualize and strategize campaigns that cause buzz, dramatically fueling word-of-mouth and boosting your chances of attracting attention in the publishing world and beyond. With eyes focused on the bottom line, today’s agents and editors look for authors who not only write well and have great ideas (hooks), but those who come with an established audience too.”

The good news? Regina says that if you get two of these three down solid, an agent or

David Donahue's Photo — The wellspring of creativity and ideas for your memoir. [David Donahue’s Photo]

acquisitions editor is often willing to help you with the third. So, where are you starting?

If you’d like a chance to get feedback on your memoir, how-to or other nonfiction book, or you’d like to pitch your book idea to top agents, there are two great opportunities coming up:

1. If your book is related to health, medicine, psychology, well-being or related issues, consider joining Regina and me at Harvard Medical School’s CME publishing course: Publishing Books, Memoirs and Other Creative Nonfiction on March 30-April 2 [Editor’s note: the class is March 14-16 in 2013]. Regina and I will be there along with several acquisitions editors and other top agents.

2. For a greater variety of genres, try the International Women Writers Guild’s Meet the Agents event on April 17, or get there on April 16 for Susan Tiberghein’s workshop, “Memoir and Metaphor: Illuminating Your Life through Writing.” Despite the name of the organization, men are welcome.

Have any questions about your memoir? Regina and I will answer your questions here when you post as a comment.

And if you’re interested in writing a book for Young Adults, you may want to check out Regina’s book WRITING GREAT BOOKS FOR YOUNG ADULTS.

Update: Regina’s latest book, You Should Really Write a Book: How to Write, Sell, and Market Your Memoir, is now available and I highly recommend it!

Too painful to write. Too painful to read.

January 13, 2009 by Lisa Tener

Guest Blog by Daniel Tomasulo, author of Confessions of a Former Child: A Therapist’s Memoir

My first popular press book came out earlier this year. Confessions of a Former Child: A Therapist’s Memoir was published by Graywolf in May and was well received.

In the six months since it has been released I have received a number of good reviews from around the country, sold out readings at several chain and independent bookstores, and was recently informed that the first printing just sold out. About as good a start as a debut author could hope for.

But something else happened I hadn’t planned on.

My other books and articles were all of an academic nature with very little in the way of an emotional connection to the material. As passionate as I might be about a topic I never had feelings, deep feelings, emerge when I presented a paper or workshop at a professional meeting. It took ten years to write the funny, sad, and tragic parts of my life.

The book laid out in detail my memories and dramas, and they are told in varying time lines making connections between my life as a child, my family now, and my work as a therapist. The funny stories were easy to read in public. I had been a stand-up comic and comedy writer for years before finishing my PhD, and the art of telling stories to make people laugh was second nature.

But losing my mother and father to cancer and heart disease respectively, partying with my second cousin, Gary, the night of his overdose from heroin, and the grief following the lose of a patient to addiction, have not been read in public.

Each time I rehearsed these stories I have struggled to get through, and haven’t yet had the guts to read them to an audience. I like to entertain with the stories that make people laugh or think, but reliving the sadness of these other stories has been difficult.

As a therapist I deal with the trauma and depression of my patients by holding their feelings for them as they work through the particulars of their lives. But as an artist presenting what I have lived — the emotional pain of accessing the material again becomes overpowering.

My original plan for the memoir was for it to be a collection of comic essays, but while on a teaching fellowship at Princeton for the 98-99 academic year, I studied over in the famed writing department which houses such luminaries as Joyce Carol Oates, Toni Morrison, Paul Muldoon (and at the time Jack Klaff and Christopher Durang.)

Needless to say it was an inspiring time and the portfolio of work I was able to produce during that period -all comic in nature – was what I used to apply for an MFA at the New School in NYC. Twenty years after completing my PhD I re-entered graduate school as a creative non fiction student, and began to give the material the time and dedication it would need to become publishable.

Along the way I was lucky enough to have Dani Shapiro become my thesis advisor. (Her memoir Slow Motion was an early Oprah pick). As the manuscript took shape I was also graced with having a course with Lucy Grealy whose critically acclaimed Autobiography of a Face was a deeply moving account of her bout with cancer that disfigured her features Lucy pushed us in her class to write about the darker aspects of our lives. When I protested she stared me down through her cancer ransacked face and delivered a line that could have come from Jung himself: “Our darkness makes us whole.”

For Lucy’s class I wrote a piece called Kettle of Fish about the infamous bar in Greenwich Village Gary ran in the 70s. The story was about the night we partied at the bar, and his accidental overdose of heroin afterwards.

Lucy loved the story and encouraged me to submit it for the university chapbook competition. I graduated and won the contest. Lucy died of an accidental overdose of heroin the following year at age 39.

I have practiced reading Kettle of Fish dozens of times but have never made it through without the dark memories percolating in my psyche. A knot forms in my stomach when the image of my cousin lying in his coffin is described in the story. The knot finds it’s way to my throat, and more often than not my tongue will have to snare a salty tear from running off my face.

But I want to read this story; I want to tell this tale. But the struggle is to tell it in my voice without reliving it. The difficulty is reclaiming the material. Consider that this barely 900 word blog entry took over three hours to compose and finally send off.

The Fellowship gave me the time I needed to get my words on paper, and the New School gave me the structure to produce publishable work. Finally, Lucy pushed me to write about the darkness. But it seems that I have to find my reading voice on my own.

My publisher and I have recently contacted the owner of Kettle of Fish (still in the village) about my doing a reading of the story there next year.

This will give me time to practice. I’ll report back here on my progress.

For more information about Dan Tomasulo please check out the website.

What if My Memoir Can Hurt Others?

December 1, 2008 by Lisa Tener

Mary Beth asked, in a recent comment in response to my blog post Too Painful To Write:

“I know that some day I will write a book that will help ME, but I’m terrified that people reading this book would be very hurt by it. Just by telling my story from my point of view, people may feel that they aren’t potrayed in the best light. How do you be true to your feelings and not hurt the people that are a part of your life now or were a part of your life in the past?”

There is no easy answer to this question, but here’s your writing coach’s advice:

1. Write the book true to yourself. You can always decide to withhold some information later–but start out with your most powerful truth.

2. Weigh your decision. When it is time to decide, ask yourself how important certain details are to the story. Perhaps you can soften or leave out those details that don’t move the story along and would hurt others. Some “truths” may be very important to the story, in those cases, see number 3…

3. Communicate. Talk to those people you portray in the book. Let them know ahead of time if their “appearance” is not negotiable. Yet, let them know you’re contacting them first so that they’re not surprised by what they see in the book. Perhaps you do want to give them the opportunity to suggest a middle ground–but perhaps not.

4. Be clear of your subjectivity. You can begin your book with a note to the reader stating that this book is about your recollection and perspective, and that you don’t hold a patent on the truth. Acknowledge that others may see a situation very differently.

5. Talk it over with an objective colleague, mentor or writing coach. It may help to discuss your dilemma with someone who’s not involved in the situation. They may shed some light on an issue that may be too close to home to weigh.

Of course, you also have the option of publishing your book as fiction. In general, fiction is harder to sell and I don’t know how much it would truly protect anyone’s feelings, as they may still see themselves in the characters.

Recently a writing coaching client of mine mentioned a friend of hers whose memoir was published and shocked the author’s family members. This author had not let anyone know the details of the book ahead of time. Her family read sensitive information about themselves at the same time the press and the public received it. Now, that is a recipe for disaster in terms of relationships.

You’re walking a fine line of being true to yourself and your story and being sensitive to those who love. There’s no pat answer, but, as a writing coach, my instinct is this: if you keep asking the questions you’re asking, I think you’ll find your way just fine, Mary Beth.

“Should I Give Up?”: What Publishers Look for in A Memoir and What You Need to Know About Publishing a Memoir

Do You Include Backstory in Your Memoir?

Writing, Editing and Style: How Important is Tight Writing and Structure?

Literary Agent Regina Brooks on How to Publish a Memoir: 3 Must Haves

Too painful to write. Too painful to read.

What if My Memoir Can Hurt Others?

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