Writing Benefits

Why Do You Want to Write a Book?

January 2, 2023 by Lisa Tener

Lisa Tener book coach — Why do you want to write a book?

I recently gave a talk to a group of coaches who’d invited me to speak to their creativity discussion group on how to “Bring Your Book to Life(R): 5 Steps to Get Started.”

Early on in my presentation, I asked participants, “Why do you want to write a book?” One participant shared, “I have a great idea.” Which is a good start, but when I dug deeper with him he said, “I want to revolutionize how coaching is done.” Wow. That’s a big idea! And a powerful motivator. What an impact that book might make! And how clarifying to dig to the deeper reasons for writing.

Questions to Ask Yourself for Clarity on “Why Write a Book?”

Rhonda Spencer and book — Helps parents raise resilient kids .

Another participant shared that she wanted her readers to understand her particular perspective and teachings. Okay, but why? What will they get out of it? How might it change their habits, beliefs, trajectories? How might it create transformations in their lives?

She’d shared earlier that she was in a state of transition in her career. Might the book be a bridge to this new work? Might it help guide her way? Might it help her establish herself and create opportunities in this new arena? What did she envision as the impact of her new work on the people she wanted to work with?

Ask yourself, “Why do I want to write a book?” Answer. And then go deeper. What about that _____? Why does that matter? What does it mean to me? Keep asking yourself questions that dig deeper and you’ll get to a more potent “Why?” that will help motivate you.

What to Do When You Feel Stuck

feedback first miracle of writing a book — Helped launch a new consulting biz

Your deeper why will motivate you when the going gets tough. When the passion gets diluted, or you hate what you’ve written, or you question whether anyone will buy this book. Because, no matter how excited you are at the beginning of the writing process, there will be times where your enthusiasm flags.

You might get busy. Tired. Hungry. Distracted. Doubtful. Distraught. Overwhelmed. Confused. Stuck.

Go back to your question: Why do I want to write this book? And continue to dig. Maybe some of your answers have changed. Maybe you’ll discover new reasons or insights. Maybe those reasons why might even suggest changes to the book–a new direction, a different structure, or more subtle shifts.

If you need help getting your book written, consider a book concept consultation (for clarity, direction, structure and for out-of-the-box ideas for an outstanding book. You can also check out my self-study programs and, if you need accountability and inspiration, join me for Get Your Writing Done!

Please share your reasons for writing a book below as a comment, so you can clarify your deeper why and we can cheer you on!

8 More Reasons to Write a Book This Year

January 8, 2020 by Lisa Tener

If you’ve follow my blog, you may have read my post or free ebook, 40 Reasons to Write a Book.

8 More!

For the new year, and in preparation for next week’s “Bring Your Book to Life in 2020” free training call, I came up with a few new reasons to write a book. I hope they inspire you.

You can find the obvious reasons (and some nifty, out-of-the-box reasons as well) in my free downloadable ebook, 40 Reasons to Write a Book.

Here’s some new inspiration:

To get in touch with the essence of your mission and message. There’s nothing like writing a book to help you get clear about your mission and calling. Writing a book informs how to share your wisdom in your truest voice. I’m living that lesson right now as I work on my favorite book yet. Wish me luck. I discuss my latest draft with my book coach on Wednesday!
To help people navigate uncertain or scary times: As a career/success coach, Tama Kieves noted the theme of fear coming up more regularly as clients grappled with greater uncertainty in our culture, environment, politics, work and social milieu, and, of course, their personal lives. Her antidote? Thriving Through Uncertainty, an invitation for readers to “walk through this doorway” into “the life you didn’t plan.” Her goal was to give her readers “the right support” for stepping out into uncertainty, to help people realize that what’s in their way, is their way, and to help them discover their most extraordinary answers, even in times of stress.
To support an under-served group of people: Unlike sleep books for parents of babies and toddlers, Lynelle Schneeberg’s Become Your Child’s Sleep Coach offers a solution to parents of school-aged children. (I can attest to its effectiveness — it empowered my youngest to become a great sleeper!
To get people out in nature: Craig Seyfried wrote Dad’s Journal: a Naturalist’s Guide to a Wonderful Life to honor his father and help others discover the adventures awaiting in deep connection with nature. Craig reports how moving it’s been to hear from people who knew and loved his dad. They share how reading about his dad’s journey inspired them.
To “change the trajectory of someone’s life”: Kristin Meekof, Author of A Widow’s Guide to Healing spent three years traveling the world (Kenya, United Kingdom, USA) interviewing over 100 widows for her book. “My hope is that someone who reads it will be able to connect with another widow’s story and feel less alone. Also, I included practical advice from experts who work with widows because loss has some very real challenges. I wanted to be able to guide widows through them.”
To Empower Readers: Leena St. Michael saw how burned out many of her fellow activists were becoming. She wrote The Happy Activist to give them tools to nurture and recharge in order to be effective and sustain their work long term.
To bring in new income streams: I recently heard from someone who just signed a book contract. Among several reasons, she envisions her book as a way to boost a new program she’s developing.
To give parents a breather: Dr. Carla Naumburg’s How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids offers parents practical tools and humor to deal with the inevitable challenges of parenting in today’s world.

Inspired to Get Going?

Need motivation to get started and impassioned? Download the free, inspiring ebook, 40 Reasons to Write a Book.

The Writing Effect: How Writing Well Improves Your Life and Vice Versa

January 16, 2018 by Lisa Tener

Writing Well and Living Well

On a radio interview with Lorraine Giordano the other day, Lorraine and I grew especially excited as we explored how learning to write well enhances your life and how living well improves your writing. In fact, it was my first radio interview standing up the whole time!

I often see my clients grow as they write. Sure, some may expect such results to some degree, anticipating that they will gain confidence, feel empowered and learn new things as they write their books. Even with such expectations they are often surprised by additional benefits from writing well.

Writing Will Challenge You

Whatever your topic, you’ll probably get to put into practice whatever you’re teaching, go deeper with it and continue to grow in your awareness, knowledge and wisdom of the topic. You’ll likely be challenged by it during your time writing. My first book was about anger and, sure enough, during a planned seaside writing retreat, our project almost ended due to anger, resentment and not feeling understood. My co-author showed up late and I felt so angry. Then she pointed out that she had expressed her desire to not put anymore work into our book until we got a publishing contract. She’d felt I’d run roughshod over her and pushed for something that she didn’t really want to do, which was true. I hadn’t heard her when she’d expressed her needs a few weeks earlier. I felt so justified in my anger, so rigid in my body, until I heard her side of the story and my heart softened with understanding.

Not only did we get to put into practice the tools we were writing about for identifying underlying anger, recognizing the source of our anger and using the awareness to communicate in health ways; we also developed a creative ritual for getting into the flow to work on our book together. Throughout the project, and especially when it was time to promote the book, we enjoyed more opportunities to put our own advice into practice! Of course, this helped us remember what our readers were going through, and kept us close to their experience and needs.

Challenges related to your topic also help you continue to evolve in your expertise. If you’re writing about meditation, perhaps you’ll suddenly stop meditating and need to revive the habit. If you’re writing about healthy eating habits, prepare for cravings for fries, burgers, pistachio ice cream or fill-in-your-weaknes-here. Opportunity knocks.

You’ll Need Support When You Get Stuck

There are times the writing flows. Then a challenge comes along. You may feel stuck. It’s often part of the process. The temporary breakdown offers opportunities to shift something. As Lorraine pointed out in our interview, it’s important to be ready for that so you don’t just put your book aside. Have supportive people in your life you know you can turn to (a friend, mentor, coach, or editor). Have a plan to reach out for support if you get stuck or challenged. Trust that these challenges truly are opportunities in disguise. By resolving them, you’ll write a better book.

How Writing Well and Living Fully Reinforce Each Other

Writing well makes you more fully alive!

On our call, Lorraine asked me how the advice “show; don’t tell” relates to life—whether or not you are writing a book.

My answer? When telling, we’re not present with feelings or emotion, we’re not connected to what we’re writing about, and we’re not making it come alive for our readers or ourselves. Telling is rote, we become the distant observer.

When you “show” with your writing, you bring it to life. To do that you can ask yourself:

How did it feel in my body?
What was going on?
What are the things I noticed about my experience?
How did the scene unfold?
What to I observe about the person speaking to me?
And my reaction to that person?

When you delve into those details, the writing comes alive for you and your readers. Your writer imagines the salty spray of the surf, or the warming sun on her face. You provide a living experience and not just words.

Writing well is about being in the moment and entering the memory or experience. If we’re present and embody the moment, if we immerse ourselves in the writing, the writing has this powerful emotional content and presence.

Life is similar: The more we allow ourselves to be present, aware of all our senses, what’s going on in and around us, the more we are fully alive.

Writing well makes us more vibrant beings. Being a vibrant being, present and fully alive, makes us better writers.

Thanks to Lorraine Giordano who asked the wonderful question “How Show Vs. Tell ReLates to Life even if you’re not writing a book?” on her radio show The Womb Happy Hour, which sparked this post! You can listen to our full interview, where we delved into writing, creativity, books and more.

Writing a Book at Midlife: The Experience, Joys, Results and Surprises

January 10, 2017 by Lisa Tener

Writing a Book at Midlife

On January 23, Dr. Randy Kamen’s “Finding Fulfillment and Joy in Midlife“ Summit begins. In some ways, this summit can be seen as an outgrowth of Dr. Kamen’s writing a book at midlife, Behind the Therapy Door, and the personal growth tools Dr. Kamen teaches in her book.

In this author interview, you’ll learn about writing a book at midlife, how Dr. Kamen’s self-published book got picked up by a national publisher and how this midlife summit can help you as a writer.

Lisa: You wrote your book at midlife. Why do you think midlife is such a powerful time for writing a book?

Randy: Because by midlife we have acquired a certain amount of wisdom and a body of life experiences that often inspire us to share our story, lessons learned or world view.

Lisa: Did you feel a sense of urgency in writing your book, Behind the Therapy Door? If so, what drove that urgency?

Randy: I felt it was an important developmental milestone for me professionally and personally. I felt I had a message from my years as a psychologist and educator and I wanted to share information that I knew would make a difference in people’s lives. At the same time it helped me to further develop my own thoughts and see another dimension to my work.

Lisa: You mentioned to me once that writing your book helped you systematize the information you had been teaching your clients, and that helped you in bringing those lessons to nurturing retreats as well as seminars with CEOs. That’s a powerful benefit of writing a book that I would not necessarily have thought of. What challenges—if any—did you have to overcome to get your book written and published?

Randy: One of the greatest challenges for me was that of organization. I needed no motivation to write. I felt inspired during most of the writing—but organizing all the material at times felt daunting. The other challenge was learning new technologies, because I knew that I had to build an online presence. There are many platforms and different technologies involved with building lists, learning social media, doing podcast, learning how to do the lighting, the audio and video of interviews, etc.

Lisa: Yes, there is so much to learn and that often intimidates aspiring authors. I think it’s important to take it all one step at a time and not try to do everything at once. I think you did a good job of that—at one point focusing on your newsletter, later writing for the Huffington Post, etc. What vision did you have for what your book would do for your life and your work?

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Randy: Writing my book opened so many doors for me—more than I envisioned. I wanted to do more speaking engagements and that came readily. I began writing for my own blog as well as the Huffington Post; Mind, Body, Green; WebMD and so many online and traditional publications. I regularly speak at conferences and retreats around the country now at a wide variety of venues.

“Power of Gratitude” panel with Arianna Huffington, Deepak Chopra and Dr. Randy Kamen. New Museum, New York.

Lisa: I quoted you when I spoke at Harvard Medical School’s Healthcare Leadership Course last fall. You said, “I now reach a global audience of influential people.” That is such a powerful result of becoming a published author. And you’re now doing so much training…

Randy: Yes, most recently I developed an online course which can be taught in 8 weeks or expanded out for a year. It’s about retraining the brain and developing more vibrancy and joy in midlife. I’m also about to launch a summit at the end of January, 2017 with leaders from the fields of mind-body-spirit. Although a tremendous amount of work and a huge learning curve this has been one of the most satisfying projects I’ve ever taken on.

Lisa: Anything else that stands out from writing a book at midlife and becoming a published author?

Randy: Meeting leaders in the field and establishing peer to peer relationships with people whose work I truly admire and resonate with.

Lisa: It must have been especially exciting to be personally contacted by Arianna Huffington and asked to join a panel she was leading. And then to be on that panel with Deepak Chopra, Gabrielle Bernstein and others. What are some surprises that came out of becoming a published author—things you didn’t expect?

Randy: One of the biggest surprises was that my agent continued to show my book to publishers after I had self-published and my book eventually got picked up by a medical publishing house. This means that it will be in book stores and libraries all over. The book is currently being edited and updated.

I never thought I would be able to create a virtual business and see patients via Skype and run groups online in the way that I’m doing now. I love that I can be anywhere and operate a business that I love. I had begun to feel burnt out—sitting with patients in my office all day. I had a successful private practice for many years and was blessed with such meaningful work, but I was ready to make a change and create something different and reach a larger audience too. That said, I still maintain a small private practice just to keep myself alive in the field. I enjoy having a small practice that allows me the freedom to do what I want personally and professionally.

Lisa: What’s the most exciting part of being a published author?

Randy: When someone tells me that they read my book and how much they valued the information and strategies, I’m always delighted. I also feel like it’s a milestone for me in a private sort of way. I’ve always liked taking on big projects and seeing them through despite the challenges that inevitably present themselves. I remember feeling the same way when I wrote my dissertation, which was also a book. I still would like to publish that data I discovered doing that research.

Lisa: Wow. I look forward to seeing that!

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Lisa: What are some midlife skills and experiences that made midlife the perfect time to write your book?

Randy: Writing a blog helped to hone my writing skills. I still write just about every day. Also, all of my years as a psychologist gave me so many stories and skills to draw upon. And of course raising my children gave me a greater appreciation for parenting, balancing family and work. After the children were launched a space opened up in which I now really had the time to write and create.

Lisa: I can see how that would create some time! Do you have clients and colleagues who’ve written books at midlife?

Randy: Yes. Many of the people involved in my summit have written books and I’ve developed some friendships with these people. Otherwise I don’t have many friends that are authors. In the town where I live it seems that most women don’t work full time jobs and many have more traditional marriages—though in midlife that seems to be changing somewhat.

Lisa: What are some of the motivations that have driven your colleagues to write a book at midlife and publish?

Randy: The people in my summit are kindred spirits for the most part. Many are on a mission to share their acquired wisdom and make a difference for the greater good.

Finding Fulfillment and Joy in Midlife: The Summit

Lisa: Tell us a bit more about the midlife summit.

Randy: The summit is an awesome collection of women and men coming together to talk about the research and cutting edge strategies for making the most out of these precious years—rather than letting them slip away. This summit will help people take more responsibility in how they choose to lead the coming years and hopefully live with greater sense of purpose.

Lisa: I think one of the things about anything you do is that you always back up your teachings with the research behind it—the evidence that it works. Tell us more about your vision for the midlife summit.

Randy: My vision is to create an annual event in which I draw from leaders around the world to contribute their energy, wisdom and know how with an ever expanding audience. This time in life is so rich and I want to be deeply involved in focusing on the best aspects of midlife—rather than focusing on the negative—the losses—the notion of the midlife crisis. Midlife I’m convinced can be the sweetest time in a person’s life.

Lisa: Wow, that’s an exciting vision and in such contrast to much of what we hear from the media on midlife. I think your vision of making it an annual event really ups the quality of a summit—when you know you want to create more events and attract top talent to the summit year after year. What can we expect?

Randy: Expect an annual event that will tap into the best resources and people coming together. Perhaps even over time creating a live event. But I must say I’m loving doing the interviews from the comfort of my own home or wherever else I may be.

Lisa: You’re a natural at interviewing. It’s fun to experience you in this new role. What are some of the interviews that will be especially relevant to aspiring authors?

Randy: Dr. Joan Borysenko just finished writing her 17th book. Dr. Alice Domar has written seven books and Dr. Rick Hanson has written four so far. Dr. Maria Sirois, and Dr. Reid Wilson also have written beautiful and compelling books. Mirabai Bush has co-authored a book with Ram Dass and is now writing another about the dying process. She is doing this with Ram Dass as he faces his deteriorating health and ultimate death. So many others have messages too that they just had to put together in a coherent way. It’s for them and their audiences. I know the feeling of needing to create and fully express ideas and experience. It can be intoxicating at times.

Lisa: What an inspiring line up! I think my readers will also be very interested in hearing my colleagues Nancy Aronie who is so wonderful about helping writers feel “safe” to write about deeper personal experiences and inspirational publisher Linda Joy. I also have to share that I am so proud that my client and Bring Your Book to Life® Program graduate, Micaela Karlsen, is perhaps the only non-midlifer in the summit. Micaela, author of A Plant Based Life, provides evidence based advice on how to stick with healthy eating, despite all the temptation “out there.”

Anything else you want to share about the midlife summit?

Randy: It’s my first one and I’m blown away by the generosity of the speakers. They have been so honest and willing to share their truth, their frailties and strengths. I am honored that so many people stepped up and contributed to this summit in such beautiful ways.

The summit is over but you can find out more about Randy’s offerings here.

And feel free to share your midlife dreams, aspirations and transformations below, as well as your questions about writing a book at midlife.

Writing the Truth: A Reflection on Authenticity in Writing and Life

March 3, 2015 by Lisa Tener

Book writing coach lisa tener — Your Book Writing Coach

On the Virgin America airplane ride back from a writers conference, I watched three movies—a decadent luxury for this mompreneur.

After watching a documentary about the life of one-time musical prodigy Ben Lee, I found myself inspired and wrote a song—not something I usually do. In fact, my family used to joke about how un-musical I am; my childhood piano teacher begged my parents to send me for dance lessons—and not because she loved my Plié or Relevé.

I found the song writing experience surprising and soul-nourishing in a way my other writing hadn’t been lately when I’d tried to write about the topic of my writers conference presentation, even though I was truly excited about that topic in its own way.

Later, as I thought about that experience and other recent writing, I realized that a truer voice was coming out in the shorter pieces—the ones where I set aside expectation and just played with words, witnessing what came forth. You might call it an “authentic” voice. Have you had that experience with certain writing of your own?

“Authentic” seems like a buzz word these past few years. You see it almost everywhere—on websites, in blog posts, social media and magazines.

Why are we so taken with authenticity? I believe we are being called to step out of the old mold of who we think we are and step into a truer—and more powerful—sense of ourselves.

This authentic self has more to offer others and can bring a greater sense of fulfillment than the outer layers of persona. But how do you access that authentic self? How do you:

Make decisions
Speak
Work
Connect
Love

from that inner landscape of authenticity? It can feel vulnerable, unfamiliar, shaky.

Start with writing:

You don’t ever have to share this writing
Instead, give yourself permission to explore on your own with no one peeking over your shoulder.

writing course Writers often refer to a writer’s “voice.” Recently, my friend and client, Bonnie Leonard, told me she wasn’t sure she had a clear voice as a writer, but then someone who took her self-study course: Reinvent Your Life: Write Now told her, “I could hear your voice as I read the materials.” Clearly she’d achieved authenticity—the words “rang true” and the reader fully connected.

So, how do you achieve that on the page? Here are three different writing secrets for discovering your voice as a writer and—in the process—getting in touch with your authentic self:

1. Free Write: Set a timer for 5 to 10 minutes. Just write as fast as you can in a notebook as your pen swiftly moves across the page without hesitation. Don’t take the pen off the paper. If thoughts come in, just include them in the writing without censor.

Write about the first thing that enters your mind. If another thought interrupts, write that down. When your timer rings, read what you wrote and see if something calls to you, or seems a particularly juicy spot to continue exploration. It might be a word, a phrase, a paragraph, an idea, or a page—follow it. Set your timer for another 10 minutes and explore the subject without editing or censoring—just write.

If the critic’s voice arises, you can write it down and respond on the page (more writing). Repeat the process one more time.

2) Dig Deep into Detail: Authentic writing is true writing: the reader experiences your story come alive for them. If you write, “I felt nervous” or, “She turned the page slowly,” there’s little to make it come alive. But if you describe your arduous journey up to the speakers’ podium, sweat dripping from your fingers, your reader shares in your anxiety and the experience comes alive and connects you. Now, you’re reaching your reader and magic can happen—for the reader and for you.

3) Write beyond what you know. You can start your writing with what you know about something, but it truly becomes interesting and engaging when you explore beyond what you already know or planned to share. Allow for space to explore an aspect you hadn’t looked at before—perhaps a forgotten memory that surfaces as you write about that trip to the podium. Where does it lead you?

True authenticity is about being present. When you are present, you allow the creative force inside you to lead you—whether you are talking, teaching, writing listening, playing, working, singing or creating anything. Authenticity requires being open, allowing yourself to be led by the wise, creative force within you that nudges you deeper in your relationships with yourself and others.

Not only will authenticity make you a better writer, but a better partner, friend, employer, employee, spouse, parent, creator and human being. Click Here to Tweet this.

Rather than try this process with your book, you may want to start exploring with some journaling instead. Here are a few journal prompts to get you started. Choose a phrase that calls to you and write those words in your journal. See where they take you. I suggest writing with pen and paper to free you up.

“My bedroom window faced…”
“I’ve always wondered what it would be like to…”
“Ever since ____________, I’ve harbored a resentment about ____________. It started…”
“I often wish that…”

Remember these writing secrets:

Don’t edit, just write—the faster the better.
Fill your writing with specific details.
Use different senses to convey details—hearing, touch, sight, taste and smell.
Let the writing—and your authentic self—lead you. Let go of trying to control the process for now. You’re not writing for anyone but you!

Share your discoveries and comments below. What does “authentic” mean to you? How do you access your authentic voice as a writer?

Where Do We Do Our Best Writing?

July 24, 2013 by Lisa Tener

A traditional favorite spot is the beach, though I have yet to write on the beach this summer.I’ve been thinking lately about where we find our inspiration and do our best writing. Some of the places that have worked for me this summer:

– A dock on the river under a tree: It was cool and the sounds of nature and human activity provided inspiration. I was also accompanied by two of my favorite writing friends, Tracy Hart and Ginger Moran.

– In bed in the morning: When I still have a toe in the dream state, the writing can be especially juicy.

– In a workshop at the University of Rhode Island’s Ocean State Summer Writing Conference: Kristen Prevalet’s nonlinear exercises helped me loosen up and take risks.

Where are you finding inspiration? Please share…